What makes a MAN

"no success without a story, 

learn the curve then dunk the ball"

"Men's masculinity is something that is Elusive and Tenuous"

   Being a man is something, but being a better version of yourself is another. Over the years, the thought of men taking control of their life, of what they make of it and stand by their principles has been an interesting debate. But what really makes a man?, who are the Men? are women an outsider here?. 

   I think before we move on, we should establish a fact that what makes a Man is his ability to be elusive(earn the right) and Tenuous(continuously prove it). In this context, gender does not exist because this ability or character is being possessed by both masculine and feminine creature and the thought of the other person being a female makes case for a superior thought which is wrong.

   Perhaps what men can actually do nowadays, millions of female do them better. So what really makes a Man? His ability to make the past envious of today's achievements, and below are 10 ways to make a better Man;

• TIME MANAGEMENT: We get the chance to carry out our daily routines within 24hours, from the moment you get off your bed to the moment you back at night to sleep. To some, the day is not enough, at times it seems shorter or perhaps the work seems bigger, but your ability to fend off distractions and squeeze out the best from yourself within such limited time counts. There are lots of jobs that require so much logistics and with a short time frame to carry it out, they demand you bring your best to the table, and this goes a long way to prove your mantle.

• DEMAND IMPROVEMENT: Everything we judge in others is something within ourselves we don't want to face. Do not get satisfied with yesterday, try and make sure today is better. Be open to growth and never-ending improvement, constantly improving one's self is a way to get and stay at the top, don't settle for less, develop a hunger for more even when they think you have enough. Be so busy improving yourself, that you have no time to criticize others. Real men don't stop, they move.

• LEARN BY DOING: Find a way to balance between learning and doing. We come across a lot of vital information that could improve our lives on the internet, facebook, and other media outlets but failed to task ourselves with it. We learn a lot in school, place of work, a friend, a lot of ways but practically do nothing. Maybe you have forgotten that one key cog of a learning process is by doing it.

• TAKING CONTROL: This for me goes a lot way to prove how manly you are, making your own decisions, standing by your principles, accepting your wrongs and taking control of your life. Decision making could prove a tricky one, with the thought of failure lingering on your mind and the fear of losing one's face, but one thing that is certain is no success without a story. Be in control, do things yourself, take it upon yourself to know more about your weakness and come out stronger because you are who you think you are.

• ASK QUESTION: As Michelle Obama ones said: "focus more on learning than succeeding, instead of pretending that you understand something when you don't, just raise your hand and ask questions." There is a clear difference between self-doubt and self-questioning. Questioning oneself doesn't need to be when you are down, it's vital to question yourself, check and balance even when you are at the peak of your powers. This gives you an edge and a clue as to where your flaws lie, and the chance to up your game.

• PROTECT YOUR WEAKNESS: One attributes of a great man is his ability to turn his laughable weakness to a strong strength. Don't expose your weak spots too often to the critics, you might not be able to deal with the pain that comes with it, protect it or better still if you got the balls, let them know while you turn it around and boss the situation if not protect it while you build it up.

• REFLECTION: "Life can only be understood backward, but must be lived for the future". At times all you need is just some time alone, with your thoughts, both past, and present. Reflecting on things you've done makes you earn the chance of knowing where the mistake comes from, and the opportunity to correct them, and if not stop them from affecting the future.

• TERRITORIALITY: "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent". Every human possesses a commanding feature to own a place or space. Without carving out a niche for yourself in the world of eaters, you end up being second fiddle. Own your space, earn the right, demand your freedom, make it yours uniquely. The moment people know this is yours, they tend to respect it and you feel relieved of the fear of intrusion.

The other ways to make yourself a better person is to Recognize your Mistake and learn from it, don't wait till someone figure it out for you. Moreover, a man's Words either make him or break him, be conscious of your utterings and respect your words. Your words define who you are eventually. 

All this are ways to ensure you become the man you dream to become, not the man you eventually become due to circumstance. You will fall, again and again, but never forget to stand up and fight for your stance, the beauty of success is to go through all that and come out strong, despite the hurdles, because no success without a story, you have to learn the curve then dunk the ball. 

So many of us become the person we become today due to negligence to little details as mentioned above, it takes nothing away from you to follow these guidelines and more, because, in the end, it's all about you.

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